Tuesday, January 8

Normal mistakes and sorting oneself out

With the first week of the year officially over now life is supposed to return to normal. Whatever normal is of course. For me true normal is still weeks away. Which in some ways I kind of like, though others not so much.

The most obvious way I am not a fan of this current faux normal is the absence of Miss Eleven. For whatever peace it brings, it leaves a twice as big gaping hole that I am done with. In fact we all are. 

Even the bird and dog are moping around.

please excuse the blurriness of this photo
the photographer is only two years old
so really not a bad effort.
What I do like about the delay in the return to normal though is the way it is kept at bay by the fact we are on school holidays until the end of the month. I do so love having all the children around. They really do make such wonderful company, well at least most of the time they do. They are far from perfect and are not always model material but that is all part of the fun of growing up. 

At the end of the day whatever they haven't learnt is because they haven't been taught. As a primary care giver that responsibility to teach falls largely, though not solely, on me. One that I at times wonder if I give due consideration to. Without of course beating myself up too much.

While I may not like acknowledging it, deep down I do realise that perfection is somewhat of myth. It is not possible for me to get everything right all of the time. In fact I may not even get some of this stuff right some of the time, but as long as I keep on trying and don't get discouraged none of it really matters. Well most of it doesn't.

Creating that image completely reinforced that for me as well. Man did I make some mistakes before I learnt how to do it. Though even now it is not quite what I wanted. In my head the curve in learning curve is a lot curvier. Actually it is a straight out arc. I made one perfectly in the fontwork gallery of Open Office but I couldn't for the life of me work out how to transfer it across to pixlr where have developed a little crush on graphic design. (As you may or may not have noticed due to the odd little change here and there of late)

Even though my previous attempts at having a year of something have not exactly been roaring successes, they have not been complete and utter dismal failures either. For example when I dubbed whatever year it was as year of the writer, I might not have become instantly signed up for a book deal but I am still here. Ever so slowly fine tuning my craft and getting the words to run just a little bit smoother.

I am told that all good things come to those who wait. So wait a wee longer I will.

This time last year lots of people were throwing around words that they hoped were going to steer them through the year. I didn't have a list as such, in fact I didn't even had one. For me I was all about making life matter. I wanted to be the best me I could and ra ra ra.

It all sounded so very promising. Even I was convinced. So convinced I went as set up a new blog that would document my journey. Naturally none of it panned out the way I thought it would when I first thought about it. It never does, and really I wonder if we are ever meant to really get things right the first time round. If mistakes really are all part of the learning curve then by rights we learn more if we get it wrong the first time don't we?

I don't know. It all seems to make my heard hurt.

I want to find something to help me have a focus the whole year through. Or at least the first few months. But I just don't know what. 

Any suggestions? 
What strategies have you in place 
to make the most of the year before you?

It is Tuesday and I have blogged. So have lots of others. They like me know that means only one thing

31 comments:

  1. I have no suggestions, I just focus on the day I am in. That seems to work for me :) Rachel xx

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    1. Yes focusing on the day before us is the most important thing

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  2. Rach has the righ idea. Know your goals and dreams, but don't rush to get there. Enjoy the journey and the learning that goes with it :) xxxx

    Hello from #teamIBOT

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    1. Very true Chantel, the journey is half the experience

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  3. yep I just take things day by day. You knwo the saying who knows what the day will bring??

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    1. I am very much a day by day kind of gal, the whole planning and what not for longer term just doesn't seem to work well for me so I have little choice but to go day by day.

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  4. Maybe you can print out a mantra/saying/plan and stick it somewhere you will see it every day - fridge, bathroom mirror, beside your bed. Something you will see a couple times a day that will remind you what you want or want to do. Even if it's just the word "Focus." I think staying focused EVERY day is a bit demanding though. There has to be room to let loose and break free and just be once in a while. xo

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    1. I used to have lots of bits of paper stuck all over all kinds of places to reminded of what it was I was aiming for or focusing on, way back when I was young and thought that by the time I was 30 I would have it all sorted.

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  5. I haven't even had time to stop and think about what my focus will be this year. I think I'm going to try something different, relax a little, go with the flow and enjoy the ride!!
    Karen xx

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    1. Sounds like a super good idea there Karen, one even I may be able to get on with!

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  6. I am still waiting with you (for the good things). Things are going very slowly in my part of the world too, but I still dream and make those goals. I think some times it does help to have a focus and others you just have to go with the flow - oh, crap, I've been no help at all :)
    Becc via #ibot

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    1. lol Becc, I think you are right, having a flexible approach and being adaptable is the most important thing

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  7. I try not to think too far in advance and while I can't always just focus on today for today, I do try not to worry too much about the future. What will happen will happen and we will deal with it when it does happen.
    Have the best year that you can !
    Me

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  8. I find if I plan too much, it all falls apart, so trying to wing it a bit more these days :)

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  9. Maybe just finding something to be grateful for every day. I don't think it really matters if you don't have a 'thing' to keep you on track, it's the journey not the destination that matters. Mind you I'm not very good at sticking to things, which is why you'll never see me do a photo a day, even though I'd like to. In saying that I did buy a diary with the aim of trying to write something in it every day, even just a thought, something I'm grateful for, or something cool my kids did. I bet you can't wait to have your girl back :) Emily

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  10. At the beginning of the year, a whole 8 days ago now I decided that patience was the thing I was striving for now. And while I certainly haven't been perfect with it, just having that intention in the back of my mind every day has certainly helped and I know we have had some really goo days because of it. I hope I can continue to keep it there, in the back of my mind, so those days when patience seems thin on the ground I can remember to take a breath and try again.

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  11. I keep things as simple as possible.
    Weekday cooking, shopping, house rules, daily routines.
    If the mundane is kept simple, I get the opportunity to focus on the things that I really want to do.
    I hope you have a fantastic year X

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  12. Rhianna, I wrote a whole blog post today on how I can't plan anything because there is always something that get into my way! And this is way I don't do New Year's resolution either... I do agree that we need to make mistakes in order to learn.

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  13. to be all cliche and shit, there is no failure in trying......I reckon mistakes are definitely part of the learning curve, and often my stuff is better after a big faux pas.
    Time to finesse.
    I have no focus advice. I run around in ever decreasing circles and then it's bedtime.

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  14. Good things do come to those who wait but also I think it's important to keep on the look out for opportunities and things that might interest you or help you in the direction you want to get to.
    That's why I'm not big on resolutions or a huge list of challenges or goals. Because tomorrow something might happen that might steer you into a completely different, yet exciting path.

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  15. Feeling very much the same. I have reading all the comments here today helpful!

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  16. Perfection is an illusion. Seriously, I spend most days convincing people to have a crack. The way I explain it is that busy trying is better than being busy feeling bad about it.

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  17. It's such a learning curve indeed isn't it? And I think it's important that we let our kids know this, and that they see our mistakes, so they know that trial and error is ok, as long as you keep working at it (life, that is!). And I've noticed many people having a 'word' to live by. I just don't get it. I guess I don't really see the importance into sorting your life according to a year and a word. I'm fanatical about planning but with something as major as that, I'll stick to taking it as it comes!
    Though, when asked at work what my goals for 2013 were, I did respond that I hope to not get pregnant until the second half of the year, so perhaps my word is abstinence ;-)

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  18. I think you're approach in the past is very you. Even if nothing quite pans out the way you want it to, you do make changes and that's what's important.
    I'm almost ready to share my words for 2013

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  19. I find if I make a plan life throws a curveball and all plans go out te window!! I now take things week by week!!

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  20. You know what I'm doing. Just trying to be more present and seeing the beauty in every day.
    I'm loving the holidays too, just having the boys at home with me and not having all the day to day running and rushing around. I'm not looking forward to it being over in a few weeks.
    I do tend to forget that I'm still learning every day too. I'm a bit hard on myself sometimes, especially about mothering :)
    xx

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  21. i do use the word tactic to focus my year / help me grow - last year was "fearless" and i did find it helped me push through perfectionism, reach out, take chances, say yes more.

    this year i chose 3 words and am about to write my post for tomorrow sharing them. Good luck hon - just keep moving forward is what i believe! one step at a time is all we can do

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  22. I'm trying to consolidate on things that worked last year and build on them. Nothing earth-shattering or exciting, but I think I'm heading in the right direction so I'll keep on going until proved otherwise! As long as it feels right in your heart, you can't go too far wrong Rhi, whatever word or direction you end up choosing!

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  23. I don't have a strategy, or even a plan for 2013. What's wrong with me! I have been thinking that lately.. shouldn't I have some goals or something?

    I just live week to week really, and try to schedule Christmas, and holidays with family. I think that is really my priority for each year.

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  24. Write a dream book and look at it when I am loosing the beat. Try hard to keep motivated by constantly reminding myself how important it is and why it is that important.

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