Goodbye October

Today is the last day of October, which obviously makes tomorrow the first day of November. 

Cue slight panic attack with mild heart palpitations. 

For the first day of November is also the first day of NaNoWrimo. A month long expedition where writers (or perhaps more aptly wannabe writers) the world over try frantically to pump out a mere fifty thousand words.

I have spent the last few weeks toying with the idea of whether or not I would join the throws and give it a go. I was not going to bother on account of being on the adventure and all but when I saw that Jess was going to give it a go I thought that maybe I should too. The fact that I don’t have any idea as to what story I might actually write is only a minor detail.

Most other years I have attempted to Nano I have had little idea as to what I would write about as well. I have never been one to plot or plan in any shape or form. Which is quite possibly why I have had limited success in completing the challenge.

Sigh.

A few years ago I had the brilliant idea of trying a slightly different take on the challenge and write a piece of flash fiction of at least 1500 words each day with prompts kindly provided by my readers. Ingenious idea really. Sadly I didn’t get too far past making a lovely table with all the prompts. 

Even more sadly I don’t currently have a copy of it to use again for this year. 

Double sigh.

I do however have the post where the suggestions were made so I can make a new table. You know when I have nothing else to do. Which could be now since we are all just chilling in the TV room not doing a whole lot. 

Murphy’s Law says though the moment I start to engross myself in it the girls will become bored and in need of attention. Because that is always the way when you are a mother.

Thankfully though today there are already a few activities in the pipeline. 

Last night another camper who has two girls who my girls had befriended, came and asked if we wanted to collaborate in a few Halloween activities with them. As a rule I am not all that into Halloween, however Zany was a little sad in missing the annual Halloween school disco so I had said a few weeks ago that we would do something. Of course at the time I had no idea what something was and may have secretly hoped she would forget about it all. Naturally she hasn’t though.

The best bit about this collaboration is that the other mother has all the ideas.

We will make some skeleton costumes out black garbage bags and white paint. Which let’s face it in theory is a brilliant idea. I have my doubts about the practise. In all fairness though the doubts are based mainly on the knowledge of my crafty (or lack there of) ability. 

Then we will warn the neighbours of the impending trick or treaters and at the same time supply them with a few chocolates to hand out to the kiddies. Pure and simple brilliance really.

Just writing

So the Mister has taken the two youngest to the pool for a swim and to burn off any excess energy that is lingering from a morning of not much. Giving me a few moments alone and unattended in the house. The house that is relatively together and not in desperate need of attention. For a change.

Photo found here

Sure the washing machine is beeping and the dishwasher waiting to be emptied and refilled, but they can all wait a little longer. The floors have been vacuumed and yesterday they were even mopped. The load in the machine is only pool towels, which signifies the washing is essentially under control. The pool towels only get washed when everything else is out the way.

All the indicators point to it being ok for me to be here.

The eldest has headed to the local shopping centre to wander around with a friend. Apparently as a twelve year old that is what you do these days.

I try to rewind my mind back to twelve but honestly it seems so long ago. So so long ago. 

I start to wonder if I ever was twelve?  Of course I must have been. It's not like I went from being eleven to being thirteen. Twelve had to have been in there.

It all seems so foggy and hazy. Such distant memories, tightly locked away, supposedly for safe keeping. I know I was twelve the first time I met the Mister. He made my heart stop and race all at once, even then. I might not have had much to do with boys at that stage but boy did I want to.

Working out the maths for how long ago I was twelve makes my mind want to explode because all I really want to do is write, not worry about what it is like having a twelve year old daughter and whether or not I am doing an ok job or not out at keeping her safe. And I must definitely do not want to work out how long ago I was twelve.Which is all totally ridiculous because I am only 35. 

I just want to write!!

Despite the quiet grumbles from my stomach I opt for spending time here rather than in the kitchen. Because that is how much I want to write. And there are no children here and there is no reason why I shouldn't just sit down and write.

It is after all day ten of Nanowrimo and I am yet spit out more than a few pages of handwritten scrawl. (Which I am certain is nothing but complete awesome because of the emotional throws I was experiencing at the time)

This year I seem to know more people than ever before giving it a go, Nanowrimo that is. It should inspire me to join their ranks and write away. Yet for some reason I am stumped. I can't seem to make the time to just sit and write. 

There just never seems to be enough hours in the day. If only day dreaming were not so time consuming. What with the desire to write, and read, or just create anything really combined with the all the other things that as a mother I am expected to do it so often feels like I never actually get anything done.

Though of course I do. It may not always be what I wanted to do, or even set out to do but things do inevitably get done. 

Much like this post. It may not be part of my Nano efforts but it is something, which is always better than nothing. Apparently. 

NaNoWriMo Day One

Well the first day of NaNoWriMo is done and dusted. I am happy to say that while I didn't make the recommended daily target of 1666 I did at least get something out. In fact I managed to get some 1200 words out. Words that right now even seem to make sense. Of course given it is some ridiculous time after midnight I am not really sure whether that sense will still be made in a few hours when I get up and re read it.

Mind you that didn't stop me from hitting the publish button. The first 30 in 30 story is live and can be read here if you are so inclined. Did I mention how good it feels to have one already under my belt?

I need to keep reminding myself of the positives because there are a few little not so positives about it. Firstly it was supposed to be a romance set in a forest and involve a basket. (Many thanks to Deb over at Home Life Simplified for the prompt.) Without giving too much away, because obviously I want you to go over and read it, so far the only part that rings true is that I did use the word basket.

The other little problem is that even though I am only 1200 words into it I am a bit attached to this character. I don't really want to give her up and start a new story just yet, particularly because I have just kind of left her hanging. I want her to get to that forest and all that comes with it. In my head I know exactly what fun and excitement is waiting for her. I just couldn't get it out right now and I couldn't not publish what I had. (Sometimes my head just has crazy notions that I must obey)

I wanted to keep going with it when I stopped but I really need sleep. Apparently it isn't just for the weak, it is in fact a necessity and one I am very short of at the moment. I feel like I have been hit with a rather bad case of insomnia the last few weeks. Now though I am just about running on empty. Three to four hours a night is not really enough, but what can you do hey?

Back to my story issues.

Thanks to some of my lovely readers I have roughly 30 suggestions, though there are a few that I am just not sure I can do. I know that the whole idea of a challenge is to challenge oneself, but at the same time I am really conscious of not challenging myself too much. I can be very easily overwhelmed sometimes and I really don't want this to be one of those times.

Thankfully though, since the whole 30 stories in 30 days was all my own little brainwave, I am able to change the rules as a see fit. Not that I really had any rules but you know what I mean. I am still not sure what I want to change or what I would change it to, or if I even will. Who knows what I may think after a bit of sleep.

What I do know though is that one way or another I will reach my 50000 word target and I will have lots of wonderful stories to share.

Here is a bit of a teaser of what I have done

It had been a long day. A really, really long day. Again. Lately every day felt like it was longer than the last. Which would have been bearable Sally were able to get more done. Instead it seemed like she was constantly achieving less and less. All the while her to do list was growing at exponential rates. She knew that life wasn't meant to be easy but she didn't understand why it had to be so damn hard all the time either.

Taking a deep breath she tried to regain some composure. She could feel herself beginning to crumble and more than anything she didn't want that to happen. Standing in what felt like the longest line in the history supermarket checkouts, with what was possibly the slowest operator since time began was not the time to burst into tears over the crapness that was her life...more

It's Friday yay!! And I am flogging my blogging with the ever lovely Grace

Help! A NaNoWriMo Plea

In just a few short days it will be November. A time when wanna be novelists the world over throw caution into the wind and embark on a crazy adventure and attempt to write fifty thousand words (or more) in only thirty days.

And you guessed it, I intend on being one of those sleep deprived crazed wanna be novelists. Which kinda works out well for me because some would say I am already on the side of crazy and thanks to my recent aversion to sleep I am already deprived there as well.

Way back in 2008, when for some reason life seemed somewhat simpler, I heard about NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) just a few short days before the start date. To say I was keen was an understatement. I couldn't wait to get started, sitting up till midnight so I could start writing the moment it was the first. Come the end of the month when I had reached the goal I was beside myself with joy. Perhaps even over the moon.

It was one of the first times ever I really thought that I might have what it takes to crack this writing gig dream. Sadly though I no longer have a copy of that manuscript. Which kinda sucks. Actually it bites big hairy balls but what can you do?

Yes I know you can back up.

Well guess what smarty pants, I did. I even had a back up of my back up and today I am still left with sweet FA. But that's ok.

Well actually I have to make it ok because I can't do anything else about it. The story is still inside me, I think, perhaps even deep down know, that when the time is right the story will just write itself. Oh how I hope that time is now.

While I may have passed the required word count my story wasn't actually finished. I couldn't end it. The main character (Rayisa) had to deal with the death of her father (Grayson) only I just couldn't write it.

Naturally I felt rather close to Rayisa and she may or may not have been loosely based on myself, just as Grayson may have  resembled my own father in a few ways. At the time Dad was still alive and killing off Grayson felt like I was writing my father's yet to happen death.

Fast forward to November 2009 and I coming to terms with the fact that Dad is no longer with me. It seemed like the perfect time to write the rest of the story or perhaps even a new one. It wasn't. Neither was 2010 or 2011. Fingers and toes are crossed for 2012.

Only this year I don't think I am going to try and write THAT story. This year I am going to do things a little different.

This year I am going to go for

Thirty stories in thirty days.

Brilliant hey?

Rather than one long story I am going to try and write 30 pieces of flash fiction in 30 days and still reach the fifty thousand words. But I am going to need your help.

Now you probably don't know this, but I have another blog. One that is specifically for my fiction work. It is a little on the small side at the moment but that is all about to change. It is where I plan to post each of my thirty stories.

As you can imagine coming up with that many different ideas is not going to be easy and this is where you come into it. I want you to give me prompts for each day. On Friday when I was Flogging with Grace, I put a call out on Making it Matter for some suggestions.

The response was awesome and I have a few ideas to get me started but I need more. And what better place to ask for help than the #IBOT community?

So hit me a location, genre or theme, and an object or any other details you think should be included. Here is what I have been given so far

As you can see I still have a way to go before I get to 30. Thank you to to those who have already helped. Feel free to leave suggestions in the comments below or on my Facebook page and make sure you swing by Fly By Fiction after the first to see how it all unfolds.

In the Beginning

The blank screen just stared back at her. She could not think of a single thing to say. Her mind was far from blank but she just couldn't get the words together to form any sense. She 

sat there and let out a big deep sigh.

“Ahhhhhh” that felt better, even in it did only last but a minute.

She tried it again. This time straightening her back and holding her shoulders square. She tended to slouch a lot and the muscles in her upper body could notice the difference when 

they were called upon to work.

Of course it took a lot more effort to stand straight and tall.
That's probably why she rarely stood straight and tall. Rayisa was against anything that needed a great deal of effort. It's not that she was lazy as such, she just wanted to ensure that she got maximum results for minimal effort. Which really if you think about it makes a 

whole lot of sense.

The sighing didn't really work. She still didn't know what to say. She couldn't even think of where to start. After all it wasn't every day that you had to give a speech at your father's funeral.

Even just thinking about it she began to choke up. It's not that she couldn't deal with her father's death, she just couldn't believe he would no longer be a part of her life. At least not in a physical way like he did now. Deep within her aching heart and somewhere amongst her pool of inner tears she knew that he would always be a part of her life and when she needed it the most she would be able to call on his strengths.

They say there is no other love like that of father and daughter, and she new it to be true. Of course she loved her mother but she was certainly a daddy's girl. Everything with dad was so easy uncomplicated. Her did not seem so judgemental and if he did disagree he rarely spoke his mind. Her father believed it was up to the person to live their life and that meant living with the choice you made.

Lifting her head and looking at the blank screen she still felt no inspiration. How could she really think about what she would say at her father's funeral when he was still alive. Pushing towards eighty he had led a good life. Rayisa had always loved hearing stories from his past.

Initially she thought she could simply retell some of his more well known stories but then she realised she would never tell it as good as him. That and the fact that someone would probably jump up and correct her. Her family was like that. Always quick to point out a flaw in someone else.

Deciding this could wait a bit longer she turned the computer off. The shut down music blared through the speakers, making her jump but also reminding her to turn them off. She still didn't understand why he had asked her to get this ready now? But then he had been doing some strange things lately.

Picking up the hairbrush she ran it through her messy hair. Looking in the mirror she caught a few sparkly hairs. Some might call them grey but to Rayisa it was a sparkle. That was the way she liked to look at everything in life though, with as much sparkle as possible.

Reveling in her natural beauty she was pleased with the reflection she saw. In some ways she had more confidence than your average beauty queen, then in others she was still a shy and quiet seven year old that dreaded talking to anyone outside immediate family.

She decided that it was time for her to pull herself together and get into action! Her head had been throbbing for a while and she took that as a sign to go for a run. Maybe all the answers would come to her then. She started to braid her hair. While she loved the feel of a ponytail bouncing about as she ran, she couldn't stand the sweaty strands that would stick to the back of her neck. A braid was much more practical and where ever possible she liked to choose the pracitcal option.

Just as she was tying the elastic on the end and trying to recall where her sneakers were she remember she couldn't just go for a run anymore. She was actually amazed to think that she had forgotten. What kind of mother was she?

Not wanting to be too hard on herself Rayisa tried to console herself with the fact that she was still only a new mum. Little Tulip was after all only 17 days old. It was still hard to believe that the pregnancy was over. She had heard people say it was the longest nine months of your life, but she had no idea exactly what they meant till faced with it herself.

It was the running that she missed the most. She had kept it up till the six month mark, but since then she had limited herself to walking only. Having waited a life time to meet her creation she didn't want to jepodize anything in the final months.

She had expected to start running the moment Tulip was born. She had even gone and gotten one of those super duper extra flash jogging prams complete with it's own suspension for rocky terrain. Then the doctor said that there should be no running for at least six weeks. Apparently her body needed to heal.

Needed to heal? She hated the way that society put such a negative spin on a woman's body. She had not been sick or injured. There was no accident or wound she just had a baby. A very natural and non ill event. Rather than healing she liked to call it adjusting.

Her body (and mind) had to adjust to the new being in her presence. A beautiful little baby sent down from the fairy angels called Tulip.

As much as she hated to admit it though, the doc was right. Once she got home, running was not something she felt like doing. Up until now she had not even thought of going for a run. With broken sleep, milk production and washing nappies who had time for a run?

Plus till Tuesday she had still been bleeding. Even though it had been nearly 12 months since her last period she remembered enough to know that running at that time of the month was never great. Now that was done with she was feeling slightly more energised. Her milk production levels had also stabilised which was nice.

Now that she did feel like a run though, she was a bit disappointed that she couldn't just take off and go for one. This being a mum meant more change than she realised. Of course she had always known that it would be a lot of work but she thought that the first few weeks would have been a bit slower. But no. As always time just flies and there is no rest for the wicked. She wasn't complaining though, so far she loved every minute of motherhood, but then again she knew what a blessing she had been given.

Most mothers think that their babies are special but she knew that Tulip was destined to a life full of greatness. She wasn't completely sure what shape this greatness would take but she new it was there. Plus she had it on good authority.

Looking at her watch Rayisa decided that she probably still had an hour to herself. Tulip was a perfect baby, already settled into a routine and very predictable. Since she had already been asleep for just on an hour Rayisa knew she had some time up her sleeve.

Hello...Hello...Is anyone there?

I am sure that is what people stopping by have been calling out as they swing by here.  I have been somewhat AWOL of late.  Did you miss me?  Never mind I shouldn't have asked as I will only get all emotional when no one responds.  (Yep that's right I am suffering from comment rejection, though it is nice to know I am not alone)

Yep that's right people I have been too busy riding the emotional roller coaster of rejection and lower than low self confidence.  Not exactly a fun ride and one that I am more than ready to jump off.  Actually if it were possible I would send my ticket back for a refund.  However an incredibly slow internet connection has also kept me away.  I took pages taking longer than three minutes to load as a sign of me not meant to be at the computer.

But enough of the wallowing in self pity and feeling sorry for myself.  Yesterday was the first day of November and that brings with it many many things, all of which are pretty exciting for me.

The first thing to come with the first of the month was the race that stops the nation.  Now even though I have am not a Melbournian, nor do I ever really want to be, I do love the Melbourne Cup.  One day, in my bestest and prettiest frock I will be there living it up.  One day.  In the mean time I spend the day hanging with my mum (and this year due to sickness all three kidlets) watching the TV coverage, eating some of the yummiest food ever while sipping exotic champagne concoctions.  This year that concoction had strawberry puree, grand mariner and a sugar cube in it.  Yum yum yum.  I did think about getting photo of it but since my card reader is cactus my camera is out of action.  Much to my disappointment and frustration.  I did however use my phone to capture this gem for WW.

So what other things come with the start of November?

None other than

Yep you guessed I am going to write me a novel in only a month.  Previous years have seen me sitting up till midnight on October 31st so that I could start writing as soon as the clock ticked over till the 1st.  This year however, thanks to the aforementioned race that stops the nation I didn't.  Actually it was just that, having three sick children and not feeling all that well myself staying up to midnight really wasn't much of an option.

I had planned to get up early and smash out my required daily total but that didn't happen either.  Being a dedicated rather trying to be a dedicated domestic goddess I opted for folding washing, doing dishes and hanging some more washing out. (Go me!)  Anyway by the time we got home and sorted dinner and bed and all that jazz the last thing I felt like doing was starting the worlds next best seller.  While just going to bed would have been easier instead I opted to sit in front of Mac for way to long to produce this little beauty  436 words of pure awesomeness right there.  Only 49564 to go.

Now the start of November was also meant to be the start of this for me as well

Only apparently I may have bitten of more than I can chew.  I had thought that since I would be writing every day anyway that getting a blog post out as well wouldn't have been that much extra but only one day down and the pressure was all a bit much.  Or maybe it was just the champers, a long day and sick kidlets?

Technically I did get my blog post up only it is not there any more.  You see I thought that I would start a new blog over at BlogHer and it would be where my novel would be stored.  Only somehow the stupid in me came out and I didn't create an account at the right place due to a location change and blah blah blah the long and short of it is that after only one day I don't actually have a blog post dated for the 1/11/11 so can not be included for any of the awesome prizes that the red starburst above speaks of. Grrrrrrrr to say the least (because of course I was going to win)

I am still going to try pretty darn hard to get a blog post out every day anyway only I will do it here instead of fussing around with something new when I clearly have enough on my plate anyway.  Though the real reason behind the new blog was because I wanted to make sure I had saved the best seller in as many places a possible.  Sadly my previous NaNoWriMo efforts are no longer with us due to be insufficiently saved.  Live and learn hey?

Now the final exciting thing to get underway yesterday was over at the lovely TME where Karlee is kicking off her Me & YOU Monthly link up.  Regular readers will know that for many weeks now, thanks to Karlee's initiative and the Me & YOU Weekly program I slowly started working towards taming my inner domestic goddess and getting the lazy so and so to do some work.  Only I still don't have my post ready.  I know that after two weeks to prepare you would think I have something but no. This was supposed to be that post but it didn't exactly turn out that way.  So after some lunch, a few errands and a bit more tidying up I will be back with all the details on my goals and hopes (other than the best seller) for the month.

Stop Wasting TIME!!!

That is what I need to have shouted at me on a regular basis.

Of course that is easier said than done, especially since for the most part of the day I spend my time with those unable to use the English vocabulary as needed.

Finding my inner voice is not always either and even when found it can be hard to hear. I wonder why that is? Possibly because there are so many different mediums and messages going in that it all just becomes a jumbled mess. Actually it is even more than just going in, there are messages being sent as well as processed and digested.

Right now as I sit here typing I can hear a car motor running right outside my front door, the music of Meatloaf as he sings "For Crying Out Loud" Summer screeching and...

oh wait that has all changed now. I got caught up looking for the link above, sending a fb message, and then put a child back to sleep...

So where was I?

NaNoWrimo. 8333 words a day. Right

As a starting point for an idea - write a story to match the name of the last song you heard

Van Morrison's Days Like These is playing now so I guess that will be the first cap of the rank so to speak!

759

*Unfortunately time did not permit me to get much out but I promise it will be out soon

Some things seems to never change

Of course they do but at times it just doesn't seem like it. Like my writing. Or rather lack there of. When I started this blog I promised myself that I would not bore my readers with the constant barrage of complaints about me not writing that seemed to fill my other blogs. Yet here I am, a mere 17 posts into this new venture and the only words I seem to be able to type out are about me complaining...gggrrr...

Maybe now that I have that out the way I can move on to other things. Though as you can imagine I have plenty of viable excuses for not regularly finding the time to write (here or anywhere else for that matter). After all I am incredibly busy. A SAHM is no easy task. There are committees for Parent Wellbeing, Fundraising, Finance as well as helping out in classes and of course all the usual mum/wife/just generally looking after people, but moving along again.

This of course is now the 23rd day of November, and as I have previously mentioned that means NaNoWrimo (note to self must go back and finish NaNoWrimo post as at this point in time it is has not been published) I know that there is still 7 days left in which to write and therefor I technically still have time to finish I am just not sure I really have it in me. After all to come up with fifty thousand words before midnight on the the thirtieth I would need to spit out an average of 8333 a day. Not impossible really but would certainly take some dedication.

Gosh that really will take some doing...This little effort is just over 300 and has taken the better part of an hour...I don't think I will even waste my time on doing the maths to work out based on that how many hours my 50 thou will take :(

324

How Art Thou Spunk Rat?

Ok so this post is a bit tricky. I actually started it on the 22nd of October. Today is actually the 24th of November. Between then and now I actually have a totally of five posts that I started but for one reason or another never actually got around to posting. Part of my own personal blogging rules for this blog is that no post will go unpublished regardless of how long it may at times take.

I am currently partaking in a writing challenge (of sorts). While the rest of the participants are feverishly trying to write at least 50,000 words that will form a novel I am just trying to get out the number totally oblivious to what the words may actually form. As such I am able to include the drivel which you are currently being subjected to (thanks for reading by the way).

The reason for my adaptation to the official rules is the fact that rather than try the novel feat in a month I have left myself with little under a week. I have recently passed the first thousand mark so at least I am on my way. The thing that I will struggle most with I think is finding the time to stay coherent. See I know I can make some time in my day but it is not without interruption which is the tricky part.

See this morning I was flying along, I had the first few paragraphs of actual fiction out but then the baby woke, the washing machine beeped and before I knew it, it was time to pick up cherub number two up from her transition trial. By the time I returned to write any idea that was once stored in my head had successfully disappeared.

So here I am.

Trying to come up with some meaningful words but unable to think long enough to get an idea. To me though the most important thing is that I write. As long as I can get something, anything really, it has got to be better than nothing!

So why the title? A long time ago, it feels almost like a life time ago actually, I had a significant other that would affectionately refer to me as his spunk rat. It was a very complicated time in my life and I will save you the detail for now, as a result of it all though I tried my hand at poetry and How Art Thou Spunk Rat? was one of my first pieces I felt I could share with the world.

When I first began to delve into the world that is Internet writing I had it published on a site called Triond (runs off to find link) though I titled it "Torn within a love affair" I also used a pen name Campbell Ray. I had forgotten how much I actually like that name. Those who know me very well in the real world will know why the Campbell, and as for the Ray, well I guess I just like the way it sounded.

Well once again my time has run out so I will bid you adieu

1553

Things to be done

Well it has been 4 days since I last sat to write. In my defense I think that every NaNoWriMo participant was entitled to at least 48 hours with out thinking about word counts, story lines and undeveloped characters. Unfortunately at the end of this time not only I but my youngest child and husband were struck by a terrible flu that kept us inactive for nearly 3 days.

Even the thought of raising my throbbing head from the comfort of my pillow was enough to bring tears to my eyes. Thankfully I am feeling somewhat more human now hence my brief flurry of activity. This is my second post in less than hour! (I could not find an appropriate segue to join the two)

So here is list of things I need to get done

1. Edit crap out of manuscript. Find title and create story masterpiece
2. Contact literary agent to source a publisher for said masterpiece
3. Send off copy to createspace who will print me one free copy of my NaNoWriMo effort
   

In between all of that I have decided to give myself some new daily writing targets. Since daily doesn't work so well for me I have broken it weekly.

1. No less than 3 Helium/Youk articles
   
2. No less than 5 Rambles/Fairy Garden posts
3. No less than 20 myLot posts

These should be attainable goals which I should be able to increase once production levels are well established.

Living the Dream

Well I survived NaNoWriMo and achieved a 50,300 word count. Which is not a bad effort I guess. However given that probably half of it will be cut and thrown into the electronic rubbish bin I still have a lot of work in front of me. (Sighs)

Back to the positive side of life though.
Writing every day (well nearly every day) was a fantastic feeling and without being too modest I think there were some incredibly moving parts. I managed to astound even myself on occasion. Naturally I realise there are some parts which need to be... shall we just say... tweaked a little more and I am fairly excited about the process.

I was talking to someone last weekend about what I had achieved. She noted how I seemed so passionate about what I was doing. I must say there could even have been a glint of jealousy in her eye. After she works long hours in the corporate banking industry so she spends most of her time worrying about other peoples money. Not exactly my idea of fun, but each to their own I guess.

For a brief moment while conversing with her I got a glimpse of what it could be like to be living the dream. Being a writer has always been my dream. During November I really was being a writer. Now I just need to keep it up! (easier said than done)

23079

That is the number of words that I have written of my NoMoNo(November Monthly Novel) Which since I am just past the half way mark in time is slightly under half for words. To me time has just become a series of numbers in relation to how many words may be written, still have to be written, and sometimes what I have just written.

Yesterday I managed to write 1600 words in a little under 2 hours. Impressive I thought. It was hand written the old fashioned way so I had guesstimated I had 1000 which I was still happy about as I was certain that I would expand on it in when I typed it out later.

I then spent a further one and a half hours at my dad's using the computer there (my mothers and I would rather not really be using it) and typing it all out. I was feeling super productive and had just about received enough gain to realise this would certainly be worth doing again. When the computer decided to have a temper tantrum and crash. Taking with it my work. I was surprised by how not devestated I was.

You see, since I began writing, I have almost lived in fear of that happening. I thought I had all the necessary precautions. I have auto save activated, a ups and I regularly post on the Internet to have a second copy. When my novel became too big to post I began emailing it to those who showed an interest in wanting to read it. I thought all bases were covered.

And if I hadn't have been using silly word pad on someone else's computer I would have been just fine.

But enough of that as my darling sister re-typed my hand written for me. While I cooked her dinner! So all's well that ends well.

Anyway I will leave you today with a photo I took at Knott's Crossing. One of my favourite places in or near Katherine.

I got it wrong!!

So as you may have guessed the novel writing venture has become somewhat of a challenge. At only 5700 words I am somewhat behind on the recommended 10002.

While I was having a little breather I had what some might call an epiphany. I have approached the story from the wrong angle. Part of me wants to jump in and start going on about the changes I want to make right now but then a much louder part says I should provide you with some more random thoughts from my jumbled mind. That way I could save the changes for when it is published.

So here's a few random thoughts

I feel very misunderstood. I constantly query if people will understand what I mean. I am aware of the fact from the moment a thought is put public it becomes subject to interpretation by others. Half the time I don't think I even understand what it is I am trying to say! So you can understand why I question if other people get me.

Generally speaking I feel that a lot of people miss the essence of what I am trying to communicate to them. This is almost always the case in the verbal form as I feel that many people around me fail to hear that alone listen to what I am saying. (ed's note most days are spent with young children).

That all aside I seem to have erected many barriers in my life which prevent me from endless opportunities. Being a woman of the new millennium I am empowered and strong. The only thing holding me back is myself and as of this very moment I have just let go.

No longer will I let fear stop me from living the life I have always dreamed about. I deserve the happy and fruitful life before me. I will share it with all that I can, however if others are not prepared to embrace the hidden joys of life, that is not my fault.

I really need to get on with my novel. I should find a name for it to, perhaps that will help it evolve into something tangible rather than just another wasted idea. I know this post will fall short of the recommended 500 words but at over 370 is good enough for now, I have characters to give life to

Great Ideas

In a bid to achieve my novel I have been thinking of ways in which I can stimulate a stream of words from my sometimes stifled brain. Here is what I have so far

1. Pick a word that will be a theme for your writing session. Find 7 synonyms for the word. Write a few sentances or even a paragraph and use each word in a different yet related context.
   
   
2. Concentrate on details such as
   

• sounds and noise
• sights
• feelings/emotions
• colours and textures
• touch
• smells and tastes
• experiences - eg smoke going up her nose as she inhales another drag of her nicotine filled death stick or the gentle breeze brushing through and shifting papers about on the table. An envelope slowly flutters to the ground

Ok so now that I have rewritten it, it does not seem as much as when I scribbled it down earlier, but at least it is a start I guess!

Prior Preparation

As of midnight tonight my life will change for ever (well at least for the next month anyway). I have decided to take on the NaNoWrMo challenge. Which basically means I plan to write at least 50,000 in the space of 30 days. Not just any 50,000 words either, they must string together and form a novel.

Since discovering this wonderful challenge a little over two weeks ago I have been able to think of nothing else. What I haven't been able to do though is decide exactly what type of novel I will write. Naturally the possibilities are endless.

These are my possibilities so far

1. Teenage romance - I figure this would be fairly easy as I had plenty of romance as a teenager to draw from
2. A fictional recount of my father's life - he has after all done some pretty cool things and since he was born in 1929 there is again plenty to draw from. Plus it would be nice to have a record of it all. Would certainly need to do some more research though
3. A daughter dealing with her father's death - this would be based on my imagination though as thankfully my dad is still alive (though quite frankly I do expect him to die any day but then that has been a constant thought for many years and it still hasn't happened)
4. Mother/Daughter relationship - probably not going to be all that positive, which means my mother would probably get upset if she ever read it.
5. Five or six random characters and the lives they lead. Somehow they would all interact with each other, with it all coming together in the end. I particularly like this idea as if I am looking like being short on words I can just add another couple of characters
6. Junior fantasy based fiction. On the upside I would only need very easy language on the downside would also need a very active imagination

So there you have it, less than six hours to kick off and I am still sitting here wondering what it is I will choose to write about. Perhaps some mindless PackRat will help me find the answer!