Death

Not exactly a lighthearted topic and generally not something that dinner table conversation is privy to. In fact, there are not many times when death is a welcomed topic for discussion. For me death is often in the forefront of my mind and has been for as long as I can remember.

I guess I should take a moment to clarify a few minor details.

When I say that death is on the forefront of my mind I actually mean that one of my first thoughts everyday is I wonder if today is the day he will finally be put to rest. I refer of course to my father.

I can not really recall the first time I had such a thought and I must say that it is only in recent times that it has reached near daily appearances. Which when you consider his current state of health is not really surprising.

When I was younger I guess it would have been fair to say that I feared the answer. My father is much older than my mother. In fact my father's first born is actually two weeks older than my mother. Not understanding the complete workings of the world I just assumed that old people died and I my dad has always been older than most.

Now however I think the day that the answer becomes yes would be a relief.

Don't get me wrong I love my father more than words here could ever explain. Not seeing him every day will be hard to adjust to and there will be a huge hole in my life for a while when he does finally pass, but watching the pain and suffering he is currently enduring is worse.

I can not begin to explain what it is like. Watching the man I have idolised for life become decrepit and frail. The one person who I truly saw as unbeatable. A tower of strength and power that few would ever be able to attain, slowly, and painfully fading away and falling to pieces.

Photo credits to Dimitri Castrique who I found on stock.xchng after searching the term death

Getting ready to explode

I have decided that my struggle to write is based firmly on the fact that I am a bottler. I bottle everything up. Much easier to get it out the way then. By tightly jamming it all into a bottle there is no need to deal with the struggles that often comes with life.

Like most people of the world I try to avoid struggles at all cost. They can be painful, if not arduous. Unfortunately though hardships and tough times are sometimes an unavoidable aspect of living. They are thrown in our direction to test our strength and make us stronger.

Depending on the struggle and the person in question, as well as fifty thousand other variables, the difficulty may or may not be successfully overcome. In the instances where the battle is not won it is more often than not just bottled up. Or swept under the carpet. Pushed out the window and otherwise ignored.

Over the years this has worked well for me. When things get too hard or I don't want to deal with whatever of life's tussles I am faced with just ignore it. I am left oblivious to any negative outcomes and I continue to sail through my existence in a self created sea of semi false happiness.

As with any container continuously filled with explosive or pressurised material there comes a time when enough is enough. When the limits are reached and the already overflowing bottle can take no more.

I fear I am at that point. Ready to explode. Unable to stop all my enclosed struggles from breaking free and forcing themselves not only to be recognised but dealt with as well.

Today's photo credits go to Caetano Lacerda I found this shot after searching the word explosion on stock.xching

It is easier to just play games...

That is why I haven't been here, writing away, pouring out my heart and soul to an anonymous audience that may or may not actually exist. Instead I have once again been suckered into the realms of virtual card collecting at Pack Rat.

The creators, Alamofire, are truly ingenious. Especially now that they have worked out how to get people to pay for the pleasure of paying. Whether or not they are actually making a profit is another question and quite frankly not the point. I assume that these people are doing something that they love, are enjoying themselves and quite possibly getting paid for it. Which in my book is essentially living the dream, so well done Josh and crew.

Some times I blame my lack of motivation or drive on my parents, particularly my mother for making my life to easy for me. I never really remember having to try to hard to do anything. Nor do I recall ever struggling or not being able to have or get something. While we were by no means a 'rich' family I had enough to remain on the outskirts of cool. I certainly never went without any of the teenage necessities, however what I had was never quite just right.

Academically I made adequate grades. Enough to show promise but at the end of the day only slightly above average. With hindsight I see that I never really exerted or challenged myself. Peers would spend hours studying to achieve the same results I achieved in half the time. For some reason though I seemed to lack the ability to push myself to really shine. A feeling that is still current in my life. I seem to have an innate ability to just accept mediocrity, actually it is more than just accept. It is more like embracing the average. Near enough is more than good enough. Any where within a 5 km radius (or thereabouts) will do.

I guess by now you are wondering what my point is.

Don't worry so am I. Random tangents seem to be my specialty, unfortunately though I have no more to offer now. Some new cards have been released so I must bid you all adieu


PHOTO CREDITS
Today's photos caused me much angst in there insertion. I am still not completely happy with the way that they look but enough time has been wasted so am letting go and moving on.

The tiger is from my own personal collection while the African Pancake Tortoise comes from Penny Mathews who can be found at stock.xchng.com

I was searching for photos tagged with laziness, there were only a few, some bears and kittens and a lady floating on the water. (which I really loved but unfortunately had issues uploading, always next time I guess) It was the animal shots that reminded my of my very lazy tiger.

I'm a Winner!!!

Today I received an email telling me that I had just won second prize in an online competition.

As you can imagined I was more than impressed. I could hardly believe my eyes. So what was it all about I hear you ask? Well I recently signed up to a new site called Kree-ations. It is great for mothers, those that care about the environment or craft lovers.

Please go and have a look, who knows you could be the next winner

Three in a row

Well sort of.

I am not sure how much of a post this will actually be. At least I am trying though.

I have been struck be a severe case of the can't be's. Actually it is not really the can't be's.
It is more of a shut down. I am drained and tired and sick of the world and most of the crap that is in it.

Ok maybe that is a bit harsh but I am sure you know where I am coming from. I at near the end of another long day that really saw not much being accomplished. To top it off, this really long day is just another to add to the succession of long fruitless days I have been experiencing lately.

Last week I lost count of the number of people who told me that I seemed flat. Personally this perplexes me as flat is somethig I certainly am not. Slightly rounded with a squishy middle is a much more accurate description.

Thanks to mordoc for todays photo. Small prize for anyone who can guess where I got it from

Oh how things can change...

This post was supposed to start like this...

I'm Pumped!!
Tonight my basket ball managed to come within two points of not losing a game. Compared to the previous deficits of sometimes well over twenty this was a huge improvement

...However by the time my lovely little laptop decided to turn itself on and open a new document for me, I found my thoughts spiraling off into their own random tangents.
Rather than the planned discussion pouring forth my mind had more pressing matters which it wanted to contemplate.

Sitting here ready type out some inspirational piece based on the great high I am getting from being part of a team all I can actually think about is

I wonder if rings make fingers swell?
If red cars go faster do red fingernails make you type faster?
I wonder how many other people are aware of the fact that their nose and ears never stop growing?

And other such burning matters that really do not have much impact to reality at all...

Perhaps it is symbolic of my life. It feels like it is spiraling off in more than just random tangents. I am in dire need of direction, purpose and most of all a driving motivation. Stuck in a vortex of blind acceptance, I still manage to float through life based on the flow of whatever is going. There is no order, rhyme of reason.

Silver lining to all this I guess is that at least I managed a post for the second day running! (Mind you if I refer back to my original posting rules this would probably not pass as the word count is just under 200 but I am sticking with it being better than nothing!)
eds note: I took so long playing with the format of this post that it is now past midnight and therefore it has saved the date as the 25th but I assure you it is my second day in a row for posting

Many thanks to slafko for today's photo. I found this interesting image on stock.xchng.com after I pressed the randomizer button...nothing like living life on the edge hey?

Happy Birthday!!

So today is my 31st birthday.

Happy birthday to me. It is also my sister's birthday only she is 24. Having exhausted all possibilities at the toy shop my mum decided that a sister was the perfect present for my seventh birthday. As it turned out it was the best present in the whole world.

In the 24 years that we have shared our birthday, up until today, there has only been one other time when we have been apart. I hated it. My sister was over in England for her 19th. While it probably wasn't my worst birthday, (surprisingly that award goes to my 21st), it certainly won't be featuring in any best of editions either.

This year is pretty much the same. No complaints as such (apart from my sister's absence) but also not really what I would call great. There are times when the silver lining can become some what faint or tarnished and this was one of those times. I would like to point out though that I am not complaining as really all I wanted was to spend time with family and that happened so at the end of the day that is all that matters.

Anyway as seems to be happening a lot these days, this is a post that I started and failed to get to posting status in the one seating. Needless to say what ever my original point may have been, it is now lost. At least I got something out though!

Today's photo comes from banj0e who can be found on my fav photo site stock.xchng.com

Happy St Patricks Day

Alright I know that I am two days late but I have a very valid reason. While I am far from Irish, I still hold a deep respect for the potato loving leprechauns. The colour green is number three in my all time favourite colours list.

Anyway I can hear you all saying if "St Paddy's day really means so much to you why has it taken so long to post about it?" Well there are in fact a few possibilities. Allow me to enlighten you.

1. In true Irish spirit I got blind rotten drunk and it has taken this long for my delicate body to recover.
2. I am just incredibly slack
3. I have been suffering in a personal turmoil as St P Day resurrects some painful history that I do not know how to deal with. It just so happens that this is the 10 year anniversary.
4. All of the above plus a few others that have managed to escape my mind at this particular point in time.

There are two correct answers up there, can you work out which they are? Leave a comment and let me know.

Today's image come straight from woodsy He has a great collection of images that are worth checking out. I actually think I have stumbled across some of his work in previous searches, when time permits I will confirm which ones they are.

Problems

One of my biggest problems as a writer is that I have a tendency to write about things that are actually part of my life. Now this on itself is not really the problem as I believe that I have a way in sharing these things in an entertaining manner and there is generally something for everyone to walk away with.

My problem lies with my readership.

As I am still only in the developmental stages of becoming a break through writer I really should promote myself to family and friends. Which means I then become very wary about what I share within my random walls...Can you begin to see the problem now?


Ed's note: This post was actually posted on the 19th of March (more than a week after it was started!!
What kind of wanna be writer have we got here? )

100 Posts and a Change of Address

That's right ladies and gentlemen. A drum roll if you please. This is officially my one hundredth ramble. It has taken a little over a year but eventually I have reached a little milestone. Here's hoping that the next hundred come a little quicker :)

Anyway all this time I have actually been hosting my blog at rhiannasrandomrants, even though the header is Random Rambles. Well today I discovered that I can easily change it to be http://rhiannasrandomrambles.blogspot.com/ which I find very exciting. Of course this means that my existing links are not longer in existence. Which sorta bites a little bit. Perhaps I will have to do something about it.
Also my share button isn't working anyone have any suggestions?

A Busy Day

I bet you were thinking that after all the work I did here on the weekend, I would now go MIA, well let me shout all you non believers down! I am here baby and I am here to write!

Well actually I just wrote a great post about my little fairy friends and how they helped me out during the day.

I must say though on the whole it has been a fairly busy day despite it being one full of changes. Everything I went to do was canceled. I had back up plans however even they went astray at times. In the end all's well that ends well I guess.

Ok so maybe my little catch cry earlier that was I here to write was a little over extended. It really is passed my bed time and I have been highly productive so I am thinking rather than ramble on about nothing I might just leave it here.

I haven't done my linkreferral links today and it doesn't look like I will get them done. (well at least not tonight) I have however washed and folded well over three loads of washing, which deserves me a huge cheer as I hate washing with a passionate vengence. My post for today at the fairy garden was also a 700+ worder so that is also worthy of a bit of a back patting!


Thanks and credit for the photo goes to Nafrea from my very fav photo site stock.xchng.
Click here to view Nafrea's profile

AddThis Button, please share me

So I am trying to add and AddThis button to my posts. I have somehow managed to do this on My Fairy Garden yet it is proving to be a little tricky over here on Rambles.

The joy of an AddThis button is that it allows readers to easily share any posts that take their fancy. So with the click of a button you can recommend my post to any number of social bookmarking sites.

Why would you do this?

Well firstly it would increase my exposure which may in turn increase my hits which may then in turn mean the odd extra cent for me here and there. I am a huge believer in every bit counts!

Any back to the button. If all has gone to plan the button should look like this

Just move the mouse over it to see your options. Some may require membership but others will not. Thanks for making me feel special by sharing me with all you know.

If all goes well and according to plan then this button will be found at the end of every post. I have a terrible feeling though it will only be on post from here on in. Oh well, can't win them all I guess...

A Sign of the Times?

Excuse me if I seem a little disjointed in this post. I am still shaking from a near on encounter. Actually all it really turned out to be was a severe case of a rather over zealous imagination. Still left me feeling a little rattled though.

Here's what happened

It is rather late (after 11.30pm) on a Saturday night. I had been tirelessly working on my layout revamp and decided that it was time I take a well earned break. I ventured out to my small front patio. There was a slight cool stillness to air. Just enough to take the stickyness off the skin but not really enough to drastically reduce body heat.

Anyway, as I sat there deciding which mindless electronic device I was going to whittle my time away on I noticed a car doing laps of the complex's car park. On the third time round they parked in an undesignated area. It is not a very large area nor was it ever really thought out well.

Despite a strong urge to tell the driver to park in a designated park I figured now was not the right time to play parking inspector.

As the car doors opened I heard cheerful banter of young male voices. Followed closely by the sound of aresol spray cans. Instantly I assumed that they were in fact trying to graffiti a parked car. My next thought was, that is wasn't just any old car but it is mine!

The more I listened the more convinced I was of what was happening.

I could feel my heart begin to race as I contemplated how I would catch these little vandals. Not ever being one to feel fear, and often lacking in common sense, I got up and turned the light on and stood in a position to clearly survey the situation.

Standing there waiting for my dog to realise there may be some action about to occur, I saw four bodies move away from the cars and head towards one of the units down the far end. I took in a breath as I went to call out to them, I was overwhelmed by the aroma of deodarant.

Suddenly through the fog of their 'shower in a bottle' spray I could see what was really going on. These young men were not here for some personal vendetta against my car or me. They were here to pick up the young women from number 17.

Quickly I jumped back into the shadows and turned off the light. I must remember more often it is not always about me.

Sitting back down I willed my heart to please stop beating so hard and fast. I couldn't believe that I had actually thought so ill of people. I know that society is full of undesirables and the world is not always a nice place however for the most part I manage to block these factors out and only see the good in people.

Tonight was far from that.

At no stage did I give these guys a chance. I am just so thankful I entered the realms of reality before I actually confronted them. I guess with all the crime and horror that fills the newspapers these days I am not entirely to blame for my over reaction.

Have you ever misread a situation as badly as this?

Nothing like a coat of paint!

As some of you may remember I have recently expressed a desire to make some cosmetic changes to my rambles. Well I would like to unveil to you the new and improved Random Rambles. I still need to add a few more widget/gadget things down the side but so far I think it is a step in the right direction.

I would also like the chance to welcome the 2 new recent followers and invite anyone interested in staying up to date with the crazy world I live in to either join the followers list or hit the subscription list.

I am also a huge fan of comments so please feel free to leave any thoughts you would like to share. Nothing like knowing people are reading to keep me writing!

Let's Get Political...

As a general rule I tend to stay away from political content. There are a few reasons for this. The first being is that politics takes a lot of brain power. Now I know that I am not exactly lacking in that particular department. Quite the contrary. In fact I am well aware of my brain's capacity I just choose not to utilise the majority of it.

Now I don't know why that is, but it is.

Anyway recent events in the political sphere has caused me to think outside my own little box.

Pacific Brands, the creator of iconic Australian labels such as Chesty Bonds, King Gee and Kasyer has decided to sack some 1800 Aussie battlers. These national top sellers are now to be manufactured overseas.

Naturally public outcry has ensued. After all the current economic downturn means need to support local industry is stronger than ever. With those in the know predicting an escalation of unemployment in coming years, possibly even months, one can't help but wonder why Pacific Bonds would want to lead the way.

To add flame to the raging fire that has union members up in arms here are a few interesting side notes that you may or may not already be aware of.

It has been revealed that in the past two years The Australian Federal Government has given Pacific Bonds $14.5 million. Now while on the surface that sounds very nice and is incredibly generous, it must be pointed out that this money was essentially that of the average Australian taxpayer. And nobody ever asked them if they were interested in investing in what has turned out to be not such an Australian Company.

Apparently Pacific Brands has been planning this move for 18 months. Which is only six months after the Government first started handing out fist fulls of cash.

Pacific Brands head honchos earn ridiculously high wages which were recently raised to even crazier levels. It escapes me how you could possibly run a company into the ground, force manufacturing operations overseas and screw over so many people while taking home such a huge slice of the pie.

A large proportion of Pacific Brands Australian workers are migrants and skilled only in the textile industry

I fail to see how brands that are supposed to be representative of the Australian way of life can possibly be made overseas. Chesty Bonds and King Gee are widely seen as representing the different forms the strong Aussie bloke may take. While Kayser has the sexy yet incredible practical and sensible Aussie sheila down to a tea. There is always something to suit everyone.

Now however these great labels will be forever referred to as sell outs. When the going looked like getting tough they got going before it happened. Far cry from being Aussie I say.

So for all those out to buy some knew socks jocks or undies with the soon to be paid second stimulus package... think again... maybe blowing it on the pokies isn't such a bad idea after all, just make sure to have a drink at the same time :)