Where the heck is 1992?

Yesterday while writing my first kiss post I had the overwhelming desire to rummage through boxes of storage and drag out my old diaries from days gone by. Though specifically the one pertaining to the events in 1992. As much as I feared entering the room due to the mountainous washing ranges I just had to see how I had described the kiss at that time.

With great fear and trepidation I boldly decided to go where clearly I had not been for quite some time. Over the mountain ranges of washing and into the top of the wardrobe where all my most prized possessions of memories are carefully tucked away.

Only as I started to go through the artefacts of days gone by I quickly realised that the book I so desired was no where to be seen. Which left me less than impressed I can tell you.

The year 1992 was memorable for oh so many things other than just my first kiss. There was also disco dancing and muscly swimming billets that came to stay for a week and somehow swept me of my feet. There was also heart ache and pain and some constant nagging from my mum. All of which I remember writing at the time and thinking one day I will need this.

Well hello, apparently that day is now and the blasted book is no where to be found!

It is nothing flash, just a standard exercise book of the era. Dark blue in colour, with a splash of pink on it somewhere I think. It really is all that is inside that matters. You see as much as I may have started it in 1992 I know there are entries from years much later in life as well. Years I may not be quite ready for everyone in the house to read just yet.

I know it must be here somewhere.

The hoarder that I am makes it almost impossible for me to part with anything, especially when it comes to words I have written. Given the importance of some of the events in life which have been documented in this exercise book come diary of a life time, I am guessing I must have already dragged it out to reminisce and in my ever so absent minded way just not put it back where it belongs.

Clearly this is part of the undeniable gold section
Love hearts from Miss 12 when she was 4
Bob was my dad.
What is really beautiful about this though is that it was
done one year and one day before she became a big sister

All is not lost though. (And rarely ever is)

I may not have found the wonders of 1992 and beyond but I did uncover some beauties from 2005.

For the most part this once rather nice leather bound, but now a bit mouldy corporate sponsored diary is awash with empty pages. There are however a few pages filled with the chicken scrawl that was my writing at the time. Some are utter crap while other bits are undeniable gold.

Flicking through it I was hit hard with the sense of some things never change. A thought that has actually been running around inside me for a while lately. Looking through this just made it feel a little lot stronger.

Aside from the cute drawings from a then Miss Four (now Miss 12) there were also lots of motivational quotes. Well I am guessing there were meant to be motivational quotes.

Sometimes the curve of the ball life throws you is very steep. 

It is always important to remember that everyone has their own 'best' and together that's what makes a team

Remember it is always important to love and smile

I particularly liked the page that had a list of weekend goals that went a little something like this

1. Have a clean house
2. Washing
3. Kitchen
4. Lounge Room
5. Outside
6. Bedroom
7. Bathroom
8. Exercise

There is then a line put through the entire list with the words CYCLONE - TRY AGAIN NEXT WEEK

Followed by countless blank pages until Pay Day arrives. I really am all kinds of awesome.

Do you still have old diaries? 

Are they as riveting as mine?

Joining in the fun and laughter of #IBOT with Essentially Jess. Also don't forget to pop back to A Parenting Life on Thursday for a bit of thankfulness.

The Internet - How I have viewed it's growth

Recently I have decided to retrace my blogging footsteps. I know that looking back is not always the most advisable way to move forwards but right now it just seems to make a whole lot of sense.

Source

Anyway my first port of call was my draft folder. There were a heap of old posts sitting there with broken links in them. Some have just been deleted not worthy of a second thought. Others have been sent to a new folder where new life may be breathed into them in the future days. And some, are deemed worth of a reshare.

I am fairly certain that my current readers were not around back on January 19th 2008, which is when this post was originally written. The now defunct link was to a parenting site I use to write for, one that is no longer in existence unfortunately.

Anyway I give to you the following

This whole Internet concept is still rather new to me. When I first went to university there was no Internet. I remember huge amounts of hype of the computers in the 'special lab'. I had no idea where or what this meant, except the computers in there were of a much higher quality than any of the others.

When I finally discovered the location of this special lab, I was hugely disappointed. These computers didn't make me type my essays any faster or better. Nor did they do half the things today's machines do! I had no idea what all the fuss was about and made a firm commitment not to be any part of it.

I stood by conviction for many years. I avoided computers like the plague. I even went back to my trusty old type writer for my essays. It was electronic after all.

Over the years I became more aware of this place called the World Wide Web. It sounded fascinating but not for me. I enjoy the simple things in life and keeping up with technology was not a priority for me.

When I finally ventured to this web world it had a name change and now referred to as the internet. I found it difficult to navigate and didn't really enjoy the experience. I had lived without computers and the all the rest of it for this long I didn't need one now.

Around August last year, my husband and I purchased our first computer and quickly signed up to the internet. Which is now known as the Internet. I was quite surprised to see that internet was now worthy of a capital letter. Hard to believe it has evolved so much.

When I sat down to write this post I had something else I wanted to say but I am glad this story came out instead. It is one I have wanted to share for a while. I really was amazed that the Internet had grown so much that it now deserves a capital letter. Where had I been to have missed this milestone?

I will save my original post for another day. My husband is watching Dogma, I had forgotten how amusing it is so I am off.

Silver Linings

I am currently in search of inspiration. My inner strength seems to have disappeared so I am seeking of a source to rejuvenate my soul with. Any suggestions are more than welcome!

Looking for refuge somewhere, I stopped by my fairy garden and found an old silver lining post. It seems I have been able in the past to find joy in any occasion! So I will keep looking....

On a brighter note here is a wonderful photo taken at Katherine Gorge recently. It is of Jedda's Ledge, which ironically has great meaning to me, given my certain situation. Of course few know much about this situation as the sharing of intimate details in these avenues at times is not advised!

The above was actually written some time ago, back in 2008. I have decided to go right back to the beginning of my blogging existence. Lately I have been feeling a little lost and without direction. I am hoping that by going over some old posts I will be able to once again find my way.

The silver lining post that I spoke about is on a blog that is not currently live, though I naturally can still access it. My heart was left feeling both warmed and broken after I read the post in question. It is too long to actually post all of it here, especially when most of it is a bit irrelevant, so I will just fill you in.

It essentially rambles on about how no matter what happens I like to look for the positive. I am certain that there is always a silver lining. Which I am. At the time of the post I had just injured my toe and the silver lining was that I had a perfect excuse to sit around and do nothing.

Only there was more to it than just that.

I was only able to sit around and do nothing because of my wonderful mother who came and took the girls for a few hours. Just one of the many wonderful things she did actually. That was the heartwarming bit.

The heartbreaking bit was the way I have been treating my mother of late. My patience has been less than short with her. I have been brash and possible even rude at times. She makes me feel obligated to do certain things and I feel a growing resentment towards her. All terrible terrible things.

Deep down I love her so much though. And in fact I am sure I only feel this way because I love her so much and I am worried for her only I don't know how or even if I can help her.

Even with time though some things don't change. The last line that I wrote back then still holds true today.

Of course few know much about this situation as the sharing of intimate details in these avenues at times is not advised!