There is no doubt about the fact that I am a thinker. I must be, I seem to do so much of it. Not that the majority of people would realise that either as I rarely share these thoughts with a collective body.
So in breaking with tradition here are some recent attempts at putting pen to paper. Please feel free to comment as you see fit. Read and enjoy :)
Sunday 24th August 2008
Ok now for the rest of the world this may not be a startling revelation. For me how it is groundbreaking and explains a great portion of my resistance to the outside world. It is frightening to be the real you for fear of ridicule and personal attack.
For instance as any regular reader will know I am a rather big believer in fairies. I don't however go around telling everyone how great they are as I would never want to be in a situation for someone to be able to use that against me.
How would that be possible I hear you ask? Easy I say. You see people that believe in fairies generally speaking have some pretty far out thoughts. So imagine if I have shared one of these far out thoughts, which in reality could also be brilliant idea bringing benefits to many, and some non believer mean person that had it in for me turned around and said “What would you know you crazy fairy believer?” Now in such a situation there is little that you can reply to that with. Especially if you are a nice mild mannered person such as myself.
For instance as any regular reader will know I am a rather big believer in fairies. I don't however go around telling everyone how great they are as I would never want to be in a situation for someone to be able to use that against me.
How would that be possible I hear you ask? Easy I say. You see people that believe in fairies generally speaking have some pretty far out thoughts. So imagine if I have shared one of these far out thoughts, which in reality could also be brilliant idea bringing benefits to many, and some non believer mean person that had it in for me turned around and said “What would you know you crazy fairy believer?” Now in such a situation there is little that you can reply to that with. Especially if you are a nice mild mannered person such as myself.
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Friday 29th AugustQuote of the day
You make me want to be a better person.
The fact of the matter is though I don't want to be a better person. I want to be me
So ideas flow around my head at cyclonic speeds. I know with some it may be a case of in one ear and out the other, that is not the case with me. Ideas float into my brain then seem to get lost somewhere in the system. I seem to start one thing and without doubt my attention is diverted into another direction. As a result I have resigned my life to be a never ending series of starts. I by no means achieve as many finishes as what I have starts in my life. Which of course is not necessarily a bad thing, though there are pitfalls.
I believe life is all about balance. Sounds easy I know but of course in reality it requires a high degree of skill in many areas. Something I don't always have.
The other night it dawned upon me that I am not an around the edges kinda gal. Like when you are colouring in, the centre is nice and easy. You have to be careful but not to careful as there is still room to fix up an imperfections. It is almost relaxing as you have the safety of not being near the edges.
Edges after all can be very dangerous. People can fall off of an edge. We are constantly told to stay away from edges and it is a warning I am generally happy to heed. These days not many people like going out on a limb
I am one of the fortunate people in life in that I do not have to incringe my personal time with the worry of paid employment. There is no angry boss if I am not sitting behind a desk bright eyed and bushy tailed by 9am. The teachers do however appreciate me getting the kids to school before the second bell. Thank god for a great canteen so I don't have to worry about lunches or we would never make it in time.
I believe life is all about balance. Sounds easy I know but of course in reality it requires a high degree of skill in many areas. Something I don't always have.
The other night it dawned upon me that I am not an around the edges kinda gal. Like when you are colouring in, the centre is nice and easy. You have to be careful but not to careful as there is still room to fix up an imperfections. It is almost relaxing as you have the safety of not being near the edges.
Edges after all can be very dangerous. People can fall off of an edge. We are constantly told to stay away from edges and it is a warning I am generally happy to heed. These days not many people like going out on a limb
I am one of the fortunate people in life in that I do not have to incringe my personal time with the worry of paid employment. There is no angry boss if I am not sitting behind a desk bright eyed and bushy tailed by 9am. The teachers do however appreciate me getting the kids to school before the second bell. Thank god for a great canteen so I don't have to worry about lunches or we would never make it in time.
You said: As a result I have resigned my life to be a never ending series of starts
ReplyDeleteIt's not such a bad thing for a writer to know a little bit about many things!
Yes evilminion, you are right a writer certainly benefits from a broad range of experiences.
ReplyDeleteI guess the part that I am concerned about is never completing anything that I start.
In an era where planning and goals seem to be fundamental to existence I seem to only set rather than achieve. There is little follow through in all that I do.
I am hoping that my awareness of the problem will lead to a solution in the not to distance future.
I really appreciate you taking the time to not only read but also comment.
I hope that the world is treating you kindly and you are loving the life you live.